The Shack

November 2nd, 2008

It is time to play a Wild Card! Every now and then, a book that I have chosen to read is going to pop up as a FIRST Wild Card Tour. Get dealt into the game! (Just click the button!) Wild Card Tours feature an author and his/her book’s FIRST chapter!

You never know when I might play a wild card on you!

Today’s Wild Card author is:

William P. Young

and the book:

The Shack

Windblown Media; 1st edition (July 1, 2008)

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Wm. Paul Young was born a Canadian and raised among a Stone Age tribe by his missionary parents in the highlands of former New Guinea. He suffered great loss as a child and young adult and now enjoys the “wastefulness of grace” with his family in the Pacific Northwest.

Visit the author’s website.

The author will be on the Blog Talk Radio show on on November 4th at 2PM ET. Come and listen!

Product Details:

List Price: $ 14.99
Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Windblown Media; 1st edition (July 1, 2008)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0964729237
ISBN-13: 978-0964729230

AND NOW…THE FIRST CHAPTER:

A Confluence of Paths

Two roads diverged in the middle of my life,
I heard a wise man say
I took the road less traveled by
And that’s made the difference every night and every day

—Larry Norman (with apologies to Robert Frost)

March unleashed a torrent of rainfall after an abnormally dry winter. A cold front out of Canada then descended and was held in place by a swirling wind that roared down the Gorge from eastern Oregon. Although spring was surely just around the corner, the god of winter was not about to relinquish its hard-won dominion without a tussle. There was a blanket of new snow in the Cascades, and rain was now freezing on impact with the frigid ground outside the house; enough reason for Mack to snuggle up with a book and a hot cider and wrap up in the warmth of a crackling fire.

But instead, he spent the better part of the morning telecommuting into his downtown desktop. Sitting comfortably in his home office wearing pajama pants and a T-shirt, he made his sales calls, mostly to the East Coast. He paused frequently, listening to the sound of crystalline rain tinging off his window and watching the slow but steady accumulation of frozen ice thickening on everything outside. He was becoming inexorably trapped as an ice—prisoner in his own home—much to his delight.

There is something joyful about storms that interrupt routine. Snow or freezing rain suddenly releases you from expectations, performance demands, and the tyranny of appointments and schedules. And unlike illness, it is largely a corporate rather than individual experience. One can almost hear a unified sigh rise from the nearby city and surrounding countryside where Nature has intervened to give respite to the weary humans slogging it out within her purview. All those affected this way are united by a mutual excuse, and the heart is suddenly and unexpectedly a little giddy. There will be no apologies needed for not showing up to some commitment or other. Everyone understands and shares in this singular justification, and the sudden alleviation of the pressure to produce makes the heart merry.

Of course, it is also true that storms interrupt business and, while a few companies make a bit extra, some companies lose money—meaning there are those who find no joy when everything shuts down temporarily. But they can’t blame anyone for their loss of production, or for not being able to make it to the office. Even if it’s hardly more than a day or two, somehow each person feels like the master of his or her own world, simply because those little droplets of water freeze as they hit the ground.

Even commonplace activities become extraordinary. Routine choices become adventures and are often experienced with a sense of heightened clarity. Late in the afternoon, Mack bundled up and headed outdoors to struggle the hundred or so yards down the long driveway to the mailbox. The ice had magically turned this simple everyday task into a foray against the elements: the raising of his fist in opposition to the brute power of nature and, in an act of defiance, laughing in its face. The fact that no one would notice or care mattered little to him—just the thought made him smile inside.

The icy rain pellets stung his cheeks and hands as he carefully worked his way up and down the slight undulations of the driveway; he looked, he supposed, like a drunken sailor gingerly heading toward the next watering hole. When you face the force of an ice storm, you don’t exactly walk boldly forward in a show of unbridled confidence. Bluster will get you battered. Mack had to get up off his knees twice before he was finally hugging the mailbox like some long-lost friend.

He paused to take in the beauty of a world engulfed in crystal. Everything reflected light and contributed to the heightened brilliance of the late afternoon. The trees in the neighbor’s field had all donned translucent mantles and each now stood unique but unified in their presentation. It was a glorious world and for a brief moment its blazing splendor almost lifted, even if only for a few seconds, The Great Sadness from Mack’s shoulders.

It took almost a minute to knock off the ice that had already sealed shut the door of the mailbox. The reward for his efforts was a single envelope with only his first name typewritten on the outside; no stamp, no postmark, and no return address. Curious, he tore the end off the envelope, which was no easy task with fingers beginning to stiffen from the cold. Turning his back to the breath-snatching wind, he finally coaxed the single small rectangle of unfolded paper out of its nest. The typewritten message simply said:

Mackenzie,
It’s been a while. I’ve missed you.
I’ll be at the shack next weekend if you
want to get together.
-Papa

Mack stiffened as a wave of nausea rolled over him and then just as quickly mutated into anger. He purposely thought about the shack as little as possible and even when he did his thoughts were neither kind nor good. If this was someone’s idea of a bad joke they had truly outdone themselves. And to sign it “Papa” just made it all the more horrifying.

“Idiot,” he grunted, thinking about Tony the mailman; an overly friendly Italian with a big heart but little tact. Why would he even deliver such a ridiculous envelope? It wasn’t even stamped. Mack angrily stuffed the envelope and note into his coat pocket and turned to start the slide back in the general direction of the house. Buffeting gusts of wind, which had initially slowed him, now shortened the time it took to traverse the mini glacier that was thickening beneath his feet.

He was doing just fine, thank you, until he reached that place in the driveway that sloped a little downward and to the left. Without any effort or intention he began to build up speed, sliding on shoes with soles that had about as much traction as a duck landing on a frozen pond. Arms flailing wildly in hopes of somehow maintaining the potential for balance, Mack found himself careening directly toward the only tree of any substantial size bordering the driveway—the one whose lower limbs he had hacked off only a few short months before. Now it stood eager to embrace him, half naked and seemingly anxious for a little retribution. In a fraction of a thought he chose the chicken’s way out and tried to plop himself down by allowing his feet to slip out from under him—which is what they had naturally wanted to do anyway. Better to have a sore butt than pick slivers out of his face.

But the adrenaline rush caused him to over compensate, and in slow motion Mack watched his feet rise up in front of him as if jerked up by some jungle trap. He hit hard, back of the head first, and skidded to a heap at the base of the shimmering tree, which seemed to stand over him with a smug look mixed with disgust and not a little disappointment.

The world went momentarily black, or so it seemed. He lay there dazed and staring up into the sky, squinting as the icy precipitation rapidly cooled his flushed face. For a fleeting pause, everything felt oddly warm and peaceful, his ire momentarily knocked out by the impact. “Now, who’s the idiot?” he muttered to himself, hoping that no one had been watching.

Cold was creeping quickly through his coat and sweater and Mack knew the ice rain that was both melting and freezing beneath him would soon become a major discomfort. Groaning and feeling like a much older man, he rolled onto his hands and knees. It was then that he saw the bright red skid mark tracing his journey from point of impact to final destination. As if birthed by the sudden awareness of his injury, a dull pounding began crawling up the back of his head. Instinctively, he reached for the source of the drum beat and brought his hand away bloody.

With rough ice and sharp gravel gouging his hands and knees, Mack half crawled and half slid until he eventually made it to a level part of the driveway. With not a little effort he was finally able to stand and gingerly inch his way toward the house, humbled by the powers of ice and gravity.

Once inside, Mack methodically shed the layers of outerwear as best he could, his half-frozen fingers responding with about as much dexterity as oversized clubs at the ends of his arms. He decided to leave the drizzly bloodstained mess right where he doffed it in the entryway and retreated painfully to the bathroom to examine his wounds. There was no question that the icy driveway had won. The gash on the back of his head was oozing around a few small pebbles still embedded in his scalp. As he had feared, a significant lump had already formed, emerging like a humpbacked whale breaching the wild waves of his thinning hair.

Mack found it a difficult chore to patch himself up by trying to see the back of his head using a small hand-held mirror that reflected a reverse image off the bathroom mirror. A short frustration later he gave up, unable to get his hands to go in the right directions and unsure which of the two mirrors was lying to him. By gingerly probing around the soggy gash he succeeded in picking out the biggest pieces of debris, until it hurt too much to continue. Grabbing some first-aid ointment and plugging the wound as best he could, he then tied a washcloth to the back of his head with some gauze he found in a bathroom drawer. Glancing at himself in the mirror, he thought he looked a little like some rough sailor out of Moby Dick. It made him laugh, then wince.

He would have to wait until Nan made it home before he would get any real medical attention; one of the many benefits of being married to a registered nurse. Anyway, he knew that the worse it looked the more sympathy he would get. There is often some compensation in every trial, if one looked hard enough. He swallowed a couple over-the-counter painkillers to dull the throbbing and limped toward the front entry.

Not for an instant had Mack forgotten about the note. Rummaging through the pile of wet and bloody clothing he finally found it in his coat pocket, glanced at it and then headed back into his office. He located the post office number and dialed it. As expected, Annie, the matronly postmaster and keeper of everyone’s secrets, answered the phone. “Hi, is Tony in by chance?”

“Hey, Mack, is that you? Recognized your voice.” Of course she did. “Sorry, but Tony ain’t back yet. In fact I just talked to him on the radio and he’s only made it halfway up Wildcat, not even to your place yet. Do ya need me to have him call ya, or would ya just like to leave a message?”

“Oh, hi. Is that you, Annie?” He couldn’t resist, even though her Midwestern accent left no doubt. “Sorry, I was busy for a second there. Didn’t hear a word you said.”

She laughed. “Now Mack, I know you heard every word. Don’t you be goin’ and tryin’ to kid a kidder. I wasn’t born yesterday, ya know. Whaddya want me to tell him if he makes it back alive?”

“Actually, you already answered my question.”

There was a pause at the other end. “Actually, I don’t remember you askin’ a question. What’s wrong with you, Mack? Still smoking too much dope or do you just do that on Sunday mornings to make it through the church service?” At this she started to laugh, as if caught off guard by the brilliance of her own sense of humor.

“Now Annie, you know I don’t smoke dope—never did, and don’t ever want to.” Of course Annie knew no such thing, but Mack was taking no chances on how she might remember the conversation in a day or two. Wouldn’t be the first time that her sense of humor morphed into a good story that soon became “fact.” He could see his name being added to the church prayer chain. “It’s okay, I’ll just catch Tony some other time, no big deal.”

“Okay then, just stay indoors where it’s safe. Don’t ya know, an old guy like you coulda lost his sense of balance over the years. Wouldn’t wanna see ya slip and hurt your pride. Way things are shapin’ up, Tony might not make it up to your place at all. We can do snow, sleet, and darkness of night pretty well, but this frozen rain stuff. It’s a challenge to be sure.”

“Thanks, Annie. I’ll try and remember your advice. Talk to you later. Bye now.” His head was pounding more than ever; little trip hammers beating to the rhythm of his heart. “That’s odd,” he thought, “who would dare put something like that in our mailbox?” The painkillers had not yet fully kicked in, but were present enough to dull the edge of worry that he was starting to feel, and he was suddenly very tired. Laying his head down on the desk, he thought he had just dropped off to sleep when the phone startled him awake.

“Uh . . . hello?”

“Hi, love. You sound like you’ve been asleep.” It was Nan, sounding unusually cheery, even though he felt he could hear the underlying sadness that lurked just beneath the surface of every conversation. She loved this kind of weather as much as he usually did. He switched on the desk lamp and glanced at the clock, surprised that he had been out for a couple hours.

“Uh, sorry. I guess I dozed off for a bit.”

“Well, you sound a little groggy. Is everything all right?”

“Yup.” Even though it was almost dark outside, Mack could see that the storm had not let up. It had even deposited low, and he knew some would eventually break from the weight, especially if the wind kicked up. “I had a little tussle with the driveway when I got the mail, but other than that, everything is fine. Where are you?”

“I’m still at Arlene’s, and I think me and the kids’ll spend the night here. It’s always good for Kate to be around the family . . . seems to restore a little balance.” Arlene was Nan’s sister who lived across the river in Washington. “Anyway, it’s really too slick to go out. Hopefully it’ll break up by morning. I wish I had made it home before it got so bad, but oh well.” She paused. “How’s it up at the house?”

“Well, it’s absolutely stunningly beautiful, and a whole lot safer to look at than walk in, trust me. I, for sure, don’t want you to try and get up here in this mess. Nothing’s moving. I don’t even think Tony was able to bring us the mail.”

“I thought you already got the mail?” she queried.

“Nope, I didn’t actually get the mail. I thought Tony had already come and I went out to get it. There,” he hesitated, looking down at the note that lay on the desk where he had placed it, “wasn’t any mail yet. I called Annie and she said Tony probably wouldn’t be able to make it up the hill, and I’m not going out there again to see if he did.

“Anyway,” he quickly changed the subject to avoid more questions, “how is Kate doing over there?”

There was a pause and then a long sigh. When Nan spoke her voice was hushed to a whisper and he could tell she was covering her mouth on the other end. “Mack, I wish I knew. She is just like talking to a rock, and no matter what I do I can’t get through. When we’re around family she seems to come out of her shell some, but then she disappears again. I just don’t know what to do. I’ve been praying and praying that Papa would help us find a way to reach her, but . . .” she paused again, “it feels like he isn’t listening.”

There it was. Papa was Nan’s favorite name for God and it expressed her delight in the intimate friendship she had with him.

“Honey, I’m sure God knows what he’s doing. It will all work out.” The words brought him no comfort but he hoped they might ease the worry he could hear in her voice.

“I know,” she sighed. “I just wish he’d hurry up.”

“Me too,” was all Mack could think to say. “Well, you and the kids stay put and stay safe, and tell Arlene and Jimmy hi, and thank them for me. Hopefully I will see you tomorrow.”

“Okay, love. I should go and help the others. Everyone’s busy looking for candles in case the power goes out. You should probably do the same. There’s some above the sink in the basement, and there’s leftover stuffed bread dough in the fridge that you can heat up. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, my pride is hurt more than anything.”

“Well take it easy, and hopefully we’ll see you in the morning.”

“All right honey. Be safe and call me if you need anything. Bye.”

It was kind of a dumb thing to say, he thought as he hung up the phone. Kind of a manly dumb thing, as if he could help if they needed anything.

Mack sat and stared at the note. It was confusing and painful trying to sort out the swirling cacophony of disturbing emotions and dark images clouding his mind—a million thoughts traveling a million miles an hour. Finally, he gave up, folded the note, slid it into a small tin box he kept on the desk, and switched off the light.

Mack managed to find something to heat up in the microwave, then he grabbed a couple of blankets and pillows and headed for the living room. A quick glance at the clock told him that Bill Moyer’s show had just started; a favorite program that he tried never to miss. Moyer was one of a handful of people whom Mack would love to meet; a brilliant and outspoken man, able to express intense compassion for both people and truth with unusual clarity. One of the stories tonight had something to do with oilman Boone Pickens, who was now starting to drill for water, of all things.

Almost without thinking, and without taking his eyes off the television, Mack reached over to the end table, picked up a photo frame holding a picture of a little girl, and clutched it to his chest. With the other hand he pulled the blankets up under his chin and hunkered deeper into the sofa.

Soon the sounds of gentle snoring filled the air as the media tube turned its attention to a piece on a high school senior in Zimbabwe, who had been beaten for speaking out against his government. But Mack had already left the room to wrestle with his dreams; maybe tonight there would be no nightmares, only visions, perhaps, of ice and trees and gravity.

Copyright © 2007 by William P. Young

Handcrafted Gifts for Christmas Giving

November 1st, 2008

This is the year when the economy has slapped us all in the face.  Right in time for Christmas.  Maybe this is the time to get our attention centered on the birth of the Messiah instead of the cavorting of the crowds.  Do we really need Santa Claus?  Maybe we need to center our gifts around the expression of love and not the spending of large amounts of money that we either don’t have or can’t afford to throw away. 

Ladies, it’s time to go shopping in your stash.  Don’t kid me.  I know you have one.  It might be fabric, embroidery & cross stitch supplies, yarn, crafts, scrapbook making supplies, ceramics, macrame, quilting or dozens of other kinds of stash.  What about that stash in your pantry?  Do you bake, cook, can or make jelly and preserves?  Consider gifting with freezer meals or mixes in a jar. 

Are you and your family able bodied?  Many aren’t.  Why not give the gift of snow shoveling, house cleaning or driving someone on a shopping trip?  Have you thought about being a personal shopper for someone who’s legs just aren’t able to walk the mall? 

Everybody has a talent.  Share yours and see how this holiday season blesses both you and the persons receiving your special gifts.  Share your ideas with the rest of us.  Next week we’ll talk more about what we can make and where to find the patterns, recipes and other ideas.

Hey, Mom! Can I Be a Beatnik?

October 30th, 2008

I remember the Beat Generation.  I wanted to be part of it.  I wanted to be beat.  Ouch!  Not like that.  Like the cool kind of beat.  I was only in junior high, but I worked hard at it, wishing I were older so I could be a real beatnik.  Looking back, I can see that I didn’t really know much about the philosophy behind it.  I just knew it was coffee house cool.  My mother let me pretend to be a beatnik.  My matteress was on the floor.  My room was filled with candles, jazz and books of poetry.  I discovered Jack Kerouac’s On the Road.  My friend, Linda, and I would sit in my candle lit room, smoke the forbidden cigarettes and read poetry for hours.  Always taking turns reading out loud and pretending we were in a coffee house.  We discovered a poem called “Onward Christian Roaches.”  We didn’t understand it at all, but latched onto it all the same.  All we had to do was pass each other in the hall at school, say the phrase and crack up.  Another part of being beat was the clothing.  Black pants, black top and black flats.  Black.  Everything was always black.  This was before the great Audrey Hepburn and her signature look.  It was during this time that I discovered bagels.  Not something readily available in small town mid-America.  No one had heard of bagels and there was certainly no place to go buy them.  I learned how to make them.  It was something different.

I always had this thing about being different.  I worked at it.  I don’t have to try anymore.  I still manage to be different, but it’s a good difference. Some call it eccentric.  Some call it hip.  Some just call it being a little different, not run of the mill.  Call it whatever you wish.  I still enjoy that little bit of different. Today all the young people seem to want to be alike.  Even when they strive so hard to be different, they manage to look like scads of others.  Be it goth, pants falling down, whatever.  They still manage to look the same.  How sad to be just like everyone else.  Travel a different road.  It’s taken me on many enjoyable adventures.

Why the World Series?

October 29th, 2008

I just read a New York Times breaking news release about the World Series.  The Tampa Bay Rays did not win, but heck, they actually made it to the series.  That’s a good thing.  But that’s not the thing that puzzles me.  Why do they call these games the World Series?  The world has nothing to do with it.  It’s always U.S. teams playing U.S. teams.  I think there’s still one Canadian team included, but that just makes it North American baseball.  It’s still not the world. Baseball isn’t just played in the United States and Canada.  I know it’s played in Japan, Cuba, Mexico and the Dominican Republic.  I’m sure there are other places.    Wikipedia gives the explanation for it being called the World Series, but I still think it’s rather pretentious of one country to declare themselves champions of the world when the world hasn’t even been invited to participate in the games.

What do you all think of this idea?  Am I way out in left field or did I just hit a home run?

Do Not Love the World

October 26th, 2008

Do not love the world or the things in the world.  The love of the Father is not in those who love the world: for all that is in the world – the desire of the flesh, the desire of the eyes, the pride in riches – comes not from the Father but from the world.  And the world and its desire are passing away, but those who do the will of God live forever.

1 John 2:15-17

Preparing for the Holidays

October 25th, 2008

Take a break from your sewing and spend a couple days baking.  Get the baked goods out of the way early.  You can freeze cookies and pies prior to baking.  You can also freeze them after they’re baked and then when Thanksgiving and Christmas roll around, you’re ahead of the game.  Here’s a few recipes to get you started.  The first is a recipe given to me by Jerry Kackly.  She was unit secretary when I worked ER at Terre Haute Regional Hospital.  The second recipe was given to me by Dennis Sturgeon.  Dennis is a nurse I worked with at Plainfield Correctional Facility.

APPLE BREAD

  • 1 cup salad oil
  • 3 cups flour
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 3 eggs
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 cup chopped nuts
  • 2 cups diced apples

Pour mixture into ungreased angel food pan.  Bake in a 350F oven for about 90 minutes or more.  1 hour, 10 minutes worked best for me.

DENNIS’S CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES

  • 2 cups flour
  • 1/4 cup wheat flour
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 1/4 cup sugar
  • 3/4 cup brown sugar
  • 1 cup vegetable oil or Crisco butter
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 (12 oz) bag sweet chocolate chips
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp vanilla bourbon extract or regular vanilla extract
  • 1/2 box vanilla instant pudding
  • 1 tsp coco powder

Preheat oven to 350F.  Add all ingredients and mix well.  Make into 2 inch balls and place in freezer over night.  Place 12 balls on an ungreased cookie sheet and bake 12 to 14 minutes or until they are the way you like them. 

Thank you, Dennis and Jerry.  I plan to do an all day mixing up and freezing of cookies and baked goods on Thursday.  It’s a flybaby party.

 

Doctors Ban Births

October 24th, 2008

Well, they would ban home births if they could.  In May the American Medical Association passed a resolution supporting state laws that discourage home births.  The national obstertricians’ group also opposes the practice.  I suppose they are having conniption fits over the latest trend of unassisted childbirth known as freebirthing.  Not even a midwife is invited to this party.

A growing movement of women in the US and in the UK are defying medical advice and choosing to give birth with no drugs, no midwife and absolutely no medical support. Supporters claim it’s how having a baby was always meant to be.  Yep.  Just drop that baby in the field or next to the ironing board, and keep on picking or ironing those shirts.  Not being in a hospital or having any medical professionals present at the birth is not all there is to freebirthing. No drugs means no pain medication.

The Discovery Health Channel premiered a documentory, Freebirthing, on Oct. 21 and will air this program again on Saturday, Oct. 25.  Tune in if you’re among the hardy and learn a little more about this practice.

Same Kind of Different as Me

October 23rd, 2008

It is time to play a Wild Card! Every now and then, a book that I have chosen to read is going to pop up as a FIRST Wild Card Tour. Get dealt into the game! (Just click the button!) Wild Card Tours feature an author and his/her book’s FIRST chapter!

You never know when I might play a wild card on you!

Today’s Wild Card authors are:

 

Ron Hall and Denver Moore

 

and the book:

 

Same Kind of Different as Me

Thomas Nelson (March 11, 2008)

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Ron Hall is an international art dealer whose long list of regular clients includes many celebrity personalities. An MBA graduate of Texas Christian University, he divides his time between Dallas, New York, and his Brazos River ranch near Fort Worth.

Denver Moore currently serves as a volunteer at the Fort Worth Union Gospel Mission. He lives in Dallas, Texas. Today, he is an artist, public speaker, and volunteer for homeless causes. In 2006, as evidence of the complete turn around of his life, the citizens of Fort Worth honored him as “Philanthropist of the Year” for his work with homeless people at the Union Gospel Mission.

Visit the authors’ website.

Product Details:

List Price: $14.99
Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: Thomas Nelson (March 11, 2008)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 084991910X
ISBN-13: 978-0849919107

AND NOW…THE FIRST CHAPTER:

Well—a poor Lazarus poor as I

When he died he had a home on high . . .

The rich man died and lived so well

When he died he had a home in hell . . .

You better get a home in that Rock, don’t you see?

—NEGRO SPIRITUAL

Denver

Until Miss Debbie, I’d never spoke to no white woman before. Just answered a few questions, maybe—it wadn’t really speakin. And to me, even that was mighty risky since the last time I was fool enough to open my mouth to a white woman, I wound up half-dead and nearly blind.

I was maybe fifteen, sixteen years old, walkin down the red dirt road that passed by the front of the cotton plantation where I lived in Red River Parish, Louisiana. The plantation was big and flat, like a whole lotta farms put together with a bayou snakin all through it. Cypress trees squatted like spiders in the water, which was the color of pale green apples. There was a lotta different fields on that spread, maybe a hundred, two hundred acres each, lined off with hardwood trees, mostly pecans.

Wadn’t too many trees right by the road, though, so when I was walkin that day on my way back from my auntie’s house—she was my grandma’s sister on my daddy’s side—I was right out in the open. Purty soon, I seen this white lady standin by her car, a blue Ford, ’bout a 1950, ’51 model, somethin like that. She was standin there in her hat and her skirt, like maybe she’d been to town. Looked to me like she was tryin to figure out how to fix a flat tire. So I stopped.

“You need some help, ma’am?”

“Yes, thank you,” she said, lookin purty grateful to tell you the truth. “I really do.”

I asked her did she have a jack, she said she did, and that was all we said.

Well, ’bout the time I got the tire fixed, here come three white boys ridin outta the woods on bay horses. They’d been huntin, I think, and they come trottin up and didn’t see me ’cause they was in the road and I was ducked down fixin the tire on the other side of the car. Red dust from the horses’ tracks floated up over me. First, I got still, thinkin I’d wait for em to go on by. Then I decided I didn’t want em to think I was hidin, so I started to stand up. Right then, one of em asked the white lady did she need any help.

“I reckon not!” a redheaded fella with big teeth said when he spotted me. “She’s got a nigger helpin her!”

Another one, dark-haired and kinda weasel-lookin, put one hand on his saddle horn and pushed back his hat with the other. “Boy, what you doin’ botherin this nice lady?”

He wadn’t nothin but a boy hisself, maybe eighteen, nineteen years old. I didn’t say nothin, just looked at him.

“What you lookin’ at, boy?” he said and spat in the dirt.

The other two just laughed. The white lady didn’t say nothin, just looked down at her shoes. ’Cept for the horses chufflin, things got quiet. Like the yella spell before a cyclone. Then the boy closest to me slung a grass rope around my neck, like he was ropin a calf. He jerked it tight, cutting my breath. The noose poked into my neck like burrs, and fear crawled up through my legs into my belly.

I caught a look at all three of them boys, and I remember thinkin none of em was much older’n me. But their eyes was flat and mean.

“We gon’ teach you a lesson about botherin white ladies,” said the one holdin the rope. That was the last thing them boys said to me.

I don’t like to talk much ’bout what happened next, ‘cause I ain’t lookin for no pity party. That’s just how things was in Louisiana in those days. Mississippi, too, I reckon, since a coupla years later, folks started tellin the story about a young colored fella named Emmett Till who got beat till you couldn’t tell who he was no more. He’d whistled at a white woman, and some other good ole boys—seemed like them woods was full of em—didn’t like that one iota. They beat that boy till one a’ his eyeballs fell out, then tied a cotton-gin fan around his neck and throwed him off a bridge into the Tallahatchie River. Folks says if you was to walk across that bridge today, you could still hear that drowned young man cryin out from the water.

There was lots of Emmett Tills, only most of em didn’t make the news. Folks says the bayou in Red River Parish is full to its pea-green brim with the splintery bones of colored folks that white men done fed to the gators for covetin their women, or maybe just lookin cross-eyed. Wadn’t like it happened ever day. But the chance of it, the threat of it, hung over the cotton fields like a ghost.

I worked them fields for nearly thirty years, like a slave, even though slavery had supposably ended when my grandma was just a girl. I had a shack I didn’t own, two pairs a’ overalls I got on credit, a hog, and a outhouse. I worked them fields, plantin and plowin and pickin and givin all the cotton to the Man that owned the land, all without no paycheck. I didn’t even know what a paycheck was.

It might be hard for you to imagine, but I worked like that while the seasons rolled by from the time I was a little bitty boy, all the way past the time that president named Kennedy got shot dead in Dallas.

All them years, there was a freight train that used to roll through Red River Parish on some tracks right out there by Highway 1. Ever day, I’d hear it whistle and moan, and I used to imagine it callin out about the places it could take me . . . like New York City or Detroit, where I heard a colored man could get paid, or California, where I heard nearly everbody that breathed was stackin up paper money like flapjacks. One day, I just got tired a’ bein poor. So I walked out to Highway 1, waited for that train to slow down some, and jumped on it. I didn’t get off till the doors opened up again, which happened to be in Fort Worth, Texas. Now when a black man who can’t read, can’t write, can’t figger, and don’t know how to work nothin but cotton comes to the big city, he don’t have too many of what white folks call “career opportunities.” That’s how come I wound up sleepin on the streets.

I ain’t gon’ sugarcoat it: The streets’ll turn a man nasty. And I had been nasty, homeless, in scrapes with the law, in Angola prison, and homeless again for a lotta years by the time I met Miss Debbie. I want to tell you this about her: She was the skinniest, nosiest, pushiest woman I had ever met, black or white.

She was so pushy, I couldn’t keep her from finding out my name was Denver. She investigated till she found it out on her own. For a long time, I tried to stay completely outta her way. But after a while, Miss Debbie got me to talkin ’bout things I don’t like to talk about and tellin things I ain’t never told nobody—even about them three boys with the rope. Some of them’s the things I’m fixin to tell you.

Mean Mommy

October 22nd, 2008
Today we have another flybaby guest article.  Nova keeps us on our toes with her humor.  Like Nova, I, too, have an aversion to grocery shopping.
“We’re out of food”
 
My family is convinced we are out of food.  Really!!!??  I went shopping on the first of the month, how can we be out of food?  Mind you they are still getting three squares and snacks.  The teenage one who never stops eating greets me as he comes in the door from school, “Whats to eat?”  I respond, “Take out the trash.”  “But I’m STARVING!!!!.”  Being the mean mom that they assure me I am, I tell him, “Eat some fruit.”  How can he not see the big bowl of it on the table? 
 
The kids go in the kitchen, open the fridge, shut the fridge.  Coming out of the kitchen clutching their rotund tummies, they swear they are starving and there is NOTHING to eat in THIS house.  The Dad of the lot, just this morning, went in the kitchen and came back with nothing. He returned to his cave, most likely plotting a McDonald’s raid on his way to work.  He informed me on his way past that he got paid yesterday and I could “get some groceries now”.  I fixed him a bagel with cream cheese, egg and a slice of turkey. (Okay, so it was the last bagel.)  He left for work happy thinking that I would go get groceries today (HAHAHA).
 
I really hate grocery shopping. I guess I’ll make some pacifiers.  I go in my so called empty kitchen/pantry…..hmm…. chocolate chip cookies.  I’ll slice and bake.  They’ll be good for an after school snack.  Spaghetti and chicken casserole for dinner with a recipe from The Pioneer Woman Cooks!  I like her.  I used the chicken last night so I’ll make it with ham this time, and PBJ’s for the two sons, 6 and 7, who don’t like anything. But first I make them taste it.  They are sure I like to see them spit food into the trash can.  Blueberry muffins for their breakfast tomorrow, or do they want hash? Lunches are packed in the fridge already.  I even found a fruit roll up for each of the boys, I like to surprise them sometimes.
 
Probably tomorrow I’ll go to the store.  If I time my trip just right my teenager will be thrilled to carry in the groceries for me after school.  If it weren’t for the fact that my husband thinks the only thing for a Saturday morning breakfast is biscuits and sausage gravy (I’m out of sausage), I could probably put
this off for another week. I”m really sick of sausage gravy.  I think I’ll eat a yogurt instead.  I saw 6 of them in the fridge just now.  Note to self….buy extra sausage next time.
 
Tomorrow they will cry “Where’s all my clothes?? I’ve NOTHING to wear,” because today I’m hiding all the clothes in the dressers.

Open Your Hand

October 19th, 2008

Give liberally and be ungrudging when you do so, for on this account the Lord your God will bless you in all your work and in all that you undertake.  Since there will never cease to be some in need on the earth, I therefore command you, “Open your hand to the poor and needy neighbor in your land.”

Deuteronomy 15:10, 11