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The Pharisees and Sadducees came, and to test Jesus they asked him to show them a sign from heaven.  He answered them, “When it is evening, you say, ‘It will be fair weather, for the sky is red.’  And in the morning, ‘It will be stormy today, for the sky is red and threatening.’  You know how to interpret the appearance of the sky, but you cannot interpret the signs of the times.  An evil and adulterous generation asks for a sign, but no sign will be given to it except the sign of Jonah.”  Then he left them and went away.

Matthew 16:1-4

I just read a post over at Rocks In My Dryer and can’t believe the great giveaway over there!  Twenty people will win 18 CD’s.  WOW Hits 1 is a complication of Christian recording artists.  The twenty winners will each receive this CD plus a boxed set of 17 CD’s, one CD for each of the artists represented on WOW Hits 1.  Click your way over there for more info about how you might be one of the lucky twenty.

This is something I received from an e-mail buddy.  Just a little lighthearted fitness funny. If you wrote this or know who did, please let me know so that I can give proper credit here.  Thank you.

This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine.

Dear Diary,
For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me.

Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who  identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear.

My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.
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MONDAY:
Started  my day at 6:00 a.m.  Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me.  She is something of a Greek goddess – with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!!

Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring!

Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around.  This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!
_______________________________
TUESDAY:
I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then she put  weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda’s rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel. GREAT-!! It’s a whole new life for me.
_______________________________
WEDNESDAY:
The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn’t try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.

Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for that early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying.

My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other shit too.
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THURSDAY:
Belinda  was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel  lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn’t help being a half an hour late – it took me that long to tie my shoes.

Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. She sent another skinny bitch to find me.

Then, as punishment, she put me on the rowing machine — which I sank. __________ _____________________
FRIDAY:
I hate that bitch Belinda more than  any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic little cheerleader. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it.

Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don’t have any triceps! And if you don’t want dents in the floor, don’t hand me the damn barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich.

The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn’t it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?
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SATURDAY:
Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her voice made me want to smash the machine with my planner; however, I lacked the strength to  even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.
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SUNDAY:
I’m having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my daughter (the little shit) will choose a gift for me that is fun — like a root canal or a hysterectomy.

I was drawn to Cuba first because I adored the madcap adventures of Lucy and Desi.  I did love Lucy and her romantic husband from Cuba. I had dreams of some day traveling to Cuba and experiencing some of that glamour.  And we can’t forget Hemingway’s Cuba.  It used to be a playground for Americans before politics (theirs and ours) changed things.   For the most part we are locked out of travel there.  I remember when the ships I worked on changed itinerary.  We were positioned to make Cuba one of our ports whenever the country opened up to us.  After a couple years we crew members lamented the fact that the Miami Cubans pretty much run our government’s policy on Cuba and gave up on the dream of having Cuba as one of our ports.

Cuba became more enticing as I made friends in Jamaica and learned how easy it would be for me to visit there.  It was just a matter of going to Port Antonio and taking a ship over.  I knew that I couldn’t have Cuba stamped on my passport, but so does Cuba.  They just stamp a tourist card and leave your passport blank.  Oh, how very tempting.  

Every week in Ocho Rios I would meet my friend, Cyd, at Bill’s Place.  We would visit until I had to get back to my ship before shore leave expired.  Some times Bill would join us.  Once after being gone for several weeks, Bill told us about a trip he had just made to Cuba.  That was one of his regular travel destinations.  Well, this last trip was a little different.  He decided he was going to marry his Cuban lady friend, sell Bill’s Place and buy a home in Cuba.  He showed us his photos, both of his beautiful lady and her beautiful country.  Of course, not all was perfect in Cuba.  But really.  Is it perfect any place?   

Bill’s move to Cuba just added fuel to my desire to see that country.  Did I ever go?  The thought of breaking the law was scary, but the thought of finally getting to Cuba and not being able to leave was even scarier.  I just knew I would end up having something go wrong and then get arrested at the Miami airport and put into jail for a nice long time.  Did I ever go?  No, I chickened out.  Do I still want to go?  Absolutely.  There’s even a little glimmer of hope now that Fidel is no longer officially in power.  But the Miami Cubans are a tough bunch.  They won’t even sell you anything in a shop downtown if you don’t speak Spanish.  We’ll talk about that some other time.

After my last post,  Ackee and Saltfish, I started thinking about what I’d do after a fire.  I’d collect the insurance and either rebuild or move my business to a new location.  Maybe Cephas did just that.  So I played with Google looking for West Indian grocery stores and restaurants in my city.  After checking out all the websites, I decided, “What the heck” and did a Google search for Cephas Hot Spot.  I found it!  It’s now called Cephas West Indian.  Yippee!!  Guess where I’ll be headed next week.

Just writing those words makes my mouth water.  Ackee and saltfish is the national dish of Jamaica.  Throw in the rice and peas and I can hardly stand it.  Jerk chicken at the Pork Pit in Mo Bay.  Buffet at the WW in Ochie.  I’m craving some good home cooking like my mother never cooked.  I’ve spent enough time working and playing in Jamaica and the West Indies that when I think of home cooking, that’s where my mind turns.  Oh, and some proper carrot juice.  Not the health food stuff!  The good stuff that comes from the Caribbean.  When I moved back to this area I was so looking forward to many visits to Cephas’ Hot Spot, a small Jamaican restaurant where my taste buds were never disappointed.  But, alas, the irony of it all.  The Hot Spot disappeared in a fire while I was out running around the Caribbean. 

I made a short stay in Ormond Beach, FL before moving back home.  I found a very good, authentic restaurant there where I could purchase a meal along with a few groceries.  I was even able to buy hard dough bread.  It was the same brand I used to buy from the grocery in Ocho Rios.  Two things they didn’t have were Blue Mountain coffee or the carrot juice.  They had tried selling the carrot juice when they first opened, but gave up on it as there just weren’t enough people trying it.  There isn’t a very big West Indian community there, and as the owner/cook told me, “Not enough of the Americans know what’s good.”  Oh, my.  What they’re missing! 

Times change and I’ve been gone from home too long.  At least the butcher shop where I buy goat to curry is still there.  I’m still looking and will not stop until I find the little grocery stores and restaurants that carry all the good things.  Until then, I still have a bit of a supply on hand.  I’m off to the kitchen to rustle up some ackee and saltfish.  It’s usually a breakfast dish, but I could eat it three times a day and be ready for more the next day.

I always liked those little radio spots done by Paul Harvey telling the rest of the story.  Now I will share the rest of the story from A Scandalous Freedom by Steve Brown. I shared the first part of the book with you two weeks ago. 

Moving into chapter six, Steve frees us from our heroes and idols.  “When you deify people in an unrealistic way, you set yourself up for guilt not rightfully yours.”  In other words, when we look at our church leaders, mentors and other “good” people and start comparing ourselves with them, we end up with guilt because we don’t measure up.  Guess what, we don’t have to measure up to anyone or any one’s standards.  We’re free to be who we are.  Conversely, we create enemies out of those who aren’t really our enemies.  Steve tells us “It is so freeing to realize that we don’t have anything to prove or to protect.”  Did you get that?  Why waste time fighting battles that take away our freedom? 

As Christians we are free to be bold.  You heard me.  We don’t have to be wimpy because we don’t want to hurt someones feelings.  Would you rather take a chance on possibly offending someone or let him slide on down into total darkness instead? 

We’re free of the pretense that if we’re Christians then everything in life is just hunky dory.  It that isn’t a bunch of something you wouldn’t want to step in, then I don’t know what is.  If a person truly believes that, then it’s time to read this book.  We are free to admit that life isn’t perfect and that we have pain and problems.  God never told us we wouldn’t have.  He promises to be there to get us through it all. 

And we’re free to break loose of our failures.  Remember now, we’re free.  That means that our failures don’t define us.  “You can define yourself by your inevitable failure to live up to the standards, or you can define yourself in terms of God’s love.”  I’m free.  Guess which one I’m going to choose.

I always wished I had one, but of course, by the time you’re old enough to want one, it’s too late.  Biology just works like that.  Consequently, I am drawn to anything about twins.  Am I maybe still looking for that long lost twin from which I was separated at birth? 

Laura has posted a giveaway of a book about twins by Gayle Roper titled Fatal Deduction.  This is a suspense/mystery novel with a lighter touch.  You can find out more about the book and it’s author at Laura Williams’ Musings.  Check it out and if it’s something you might like to read, leave a comment there for an entry into her giveaway.

This same book is being given away at Ashley – A Daughter of The King.  Enter there as well for an extra chance of winning a copy.

I’ve been musing on a quote I recently read.  

“Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.”

— Lin Yutang

This so eloquently describes what I would like to accomplish during this time of my life.  I want to downsize and simplify.  In other words, eliminate the non-essentials.  Without the need to care for so much stuff, a person can truly appreciate the more important things of life – family and friends, the beauty of nature, the talents and abilities with which we’ve been blessed and most importantly, develop a deep and abiding relationship with our Creator.

Take time to slow down and appreciate the noble arts.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal; but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven. where neither moth nor rust consumes and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there you heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19-21